I'm Not Like Everybody Else
by TheFluidThespian
Summary: He's heard about these types of kids, and what they possibly could be doing other than listening to heavy, screamy metal rock bands. Things such as being constantly depressed, suicidal, and sometimes a bit angsty. Logan said they were just a bunch of stereotypes. Well, stereotypes or not, Hesh still intended on keeping a keen eye on his baby brother. (Rated T to be safe) [COMPLETE]
1. The Outcast

**Hey readers! I'm back with another story, and I'm actually pretty excited about this one since it features an Emo!Logan. I've wanted to write something like this for a while, and now it's happening. I don't know how many chapters I intend on writing, but I will hopefully enjoy writing all of them. It might be a two/three shot (I dunno yet). But yeah! Without further ado, enjoy :33**

 **Sidenotes: Logan is 15, and Hesh is 16.**

* * *

It'd been almost a year and a half since the Walker sons last saw their dad. Being a brother of the elite group of Ghosts, it felt that Elias' access to his boys was stripped away. He grew to be sad at some times. They were his world outside of this dangerous one. They were on his mind everyday. He'd think about their growth, their health, everything every parent thinks of whenever their children are far from their reach. He'd video chat with them every once in a while, which started out as seeing both of his boys, smiling and chatting. Very recently, it'd only be Hesh who'd be talking to him. Odd enough, whenever he asked where Logan was, the older brother would hesitate, then say that he lost his voice(as in being sick) or is taking a walk. It'd happen on every call they made, and it worried Elias. On the other side of the screen, only Hesh knew where his younger brother would be. He'd be inside the house, locked away in his room and for whatever reason not wanting to talk to his father.

Or at least, not talking to him where Elias wouldn't be able to recognize him.

Over the year their dad was gone, a rather "emotional" phase hit Logan like a bus. His dress sense became a bit duller, wearing black jeans, shoes, and shirts. It was almost like he was ready for fall or winter. He also had his hair swept over one eye as his facial expression sometimes remained blank and unreadable. Whenever Hesh went into his room, he'd see his younger brother doodling in journal, always having his headphones covering his ears, the music playing loud enough for him to block out all of the sound. Not that Hesh had a problem with whatever phase Logan was going through, yet he sometimes worried. He's heard about these types of kids, and what they possibly could be doing other than listening to heavy, screamy metal rock bands. Things such as being constantly depressed, suicidal, and sometimes a bit angsty. Their guardian, Monica, was too worried, and told Logan to wear short-sleeved shirts if he was going to be that kind of teen. Logan once got pissed off when they were all assuming that this was how all of these gothic kids act, claiming they were all a bunch of stereotypes.

Well, stereotypes or not, Hesh still intended on keeping a keen eye on his baby brother.

* * *

Logan didn't come down for dinner that night. But really, all there was were left overs anyway. Hesh heated up a plate of chicken and rice, meant for his brother, while waiting for Elias to answer the Skype call. It took a lot of time, and he used it to set his brother's dinner off to side to cool off a bit on the counter. Then when the little tune on the computer came to a stop, Hesh walked over only to see his father's face on the chatting screen. His face lightened up, "Dad, hey!"

"Heya, Hesh," Elias said, trying to sound excited but sounded weary, "What've you been up to?"

"Well, I got my license."

"Did you really?"

"Took a few tries, but the hard work paid off."

"Good for you, son."

Hesh's grin faded, seeing his father's tired expression, "Is everything okay, dad?"

Elias stayed silent, sighing and clearing his throat, "We lost one of our men, Hesh. He's M.I.A."

"Damn, seriously?" Hesh blinked.

"It's really why I couldn't talk to you for a while. We spent weeks searching for him, but we called it in."

"Sorry to hear..."

Elias nodded, letting out a breath, trying to smile, "How's Logan doing? He doesn't have that 'sore throat', does he?"

Hesh hesitated for a moment, "Actually... He's asleep now. He had a pretty long day, and... Yeah..."

The old man blinked, straightening up, "Son, can I ask you something?"

"S-Sure."

"Is Logan alright? Is he upset?"

"N-No? He's fine, dad. I... Really can't answer why he doesn't want to see you, but that doesn't mean he's upset..."

A saddening look appeared in Elias' eyes, and Hesh stopped. "Dad?"

"It's been a while," The dad spoke, almost murmuring, "More than that perhaps... Well, you keep an eye on him, alright. Tell him I love him and... I'll actually be coming home in a few days."

"R-Really?" Hesh smiled, "I really can't wait to see you. I think Monica's pretty fed up with us anyway."

Elias laughed, "I'll talk to you soon. Love you, son."

"Bye, dad!"

The call ended, and Hesh couldn't help but sigh a bit as well. Monica, who'd been reading a cooking magazine on the couch, looked at him, "Are you sure Logan's not upset?"

"W-What? No." Hesh scoffed.

"Well it wouldn't hurt to ask him. He sure won't talk to me, but I think he'll talk to you."

"Yeah... I was gonna go up there anyway."

He walked over and grabbed the plate of food. He walked up the stairs, seeing Logan's bedroom door opened just a little bit. The light was on, yet it was silent in there. Hesh gave a few taps on the door, and he peaked in. He let out a sigh relief to see that Logan wasn't doing anything to hurt himself. He just sat on his bed, headphones on, and reading a book on the second world war. Logan looked up before sitting up as his brother entered with a plate of food. "Hey," Hesh greeted, setting the plate down on the desk beside Logan's bed. "Whatcha listening to?"

"Hmm?" Logan mumbled before taking off his headphones.

"I said what are you listening to?"

"Just a song. It's ten years old, but pretty cool."

"Okay, smart ass. Be a little more specific than that."

"It's by A Day to Remember. Wanna listen?"

Logan handed the headphones over to Hesh, who braced himself for any screaming vocals or anything loud. But instead, his ears were filled with a calm, acoustic guitar along with a male voice, singing his lyrics softly. Hesh smiled a little. _It's actually not that bad._ Logan grinned. "Cool song," Hesh commented, taking the ear-wear off, "What was it called again?"

"Uh, 'You had me at hello'," Logan answered, taking his headphones back.

Hesh cleared his throat and sat on the edge of his brother's bed, "So I wanted to ask you something: Are you upset?"

Logan chuckled a bit, "Why would I be upset?"

"Well, I just finished talking to dad, and... He thinks you're mad with him. Wanna talk about it?"

Logan frowned, looking down, "I don't want him to get the idea that I'm mad at him, which isn't true. But... What if he sees me this way? What will he think?"

"I'm sure he wouldn't care-"

"So he wouldn't care that his son is wearing eyeliner?"

"Er...-"

"Exactly." The two siblings stayed silent for a minute, their eyes lingering around the room. Logan pursed his lips, and he sighed, "I love him, Hesh. I miss him a lot. But no. I'm not upset with anything."

"He misses you too," Hesh spoke, "Oh, and he said he'd be home in a few days. Cool right?"

"What?" Logan stammered, "Oh... Yeah, that'll be something to look forward to."

Hesh noted how Logan's face paled a bit, and he laid a hand on his shoulder, "He's our dad, Logan. He'll love us no matter what, 'kay?"

The younger brother stayed silent, feeling a bubble in his throat. When he finally did nod, he felt a dreaded feeling begin to build up in his belly. Somewhere inside, he just knew that Elias wouldn't like what he saw of his son.

* * *

 **I'm actually enjoying writing this so far :D What do you guys think?**


	2. Coffin

**Geez, after I uploaded the first chapter, I already wanted to write more! Here it goes!**

 **Oh and the songs I'm listening to just make me want to head bang my head off! It's mostly BVB :D Okay, I'm just gonna stop talking now...**

* * *

Normally on free periods, Hesh would hang out with a few other friends outside of the school, Brock, Craig, and Jacob. It was a cloudless blue, and the boys were dressed in sleeveless shirts, except for Hesh of course. They talked about upcoming school events, girls, manly business', etc. The main topic was mostly focused on the hottest girl in school, who happened to be a senior while they were still a grade under her. Hesh had no say in the conversation. He really wasn't listening anyway. That was until the voices faded for a minute, and Hesh looked over at them to see what's got their attention. Not too far away was Logan, sweeping the hair out of his eyes a bit, but that didn't change a bit. He sat at a table, blind to the fact that Hesh and his friends were watching him draw his pencil drawings. He had earbuds in this time, and the oldest of the group, Brock, poked at Hesh, "Hey, Davie, is that your brother over there?"

"What about him?" Hesh questioned.

"What's with the who 'emo' thing with him? I mean, he sort of looks like a _chick_ right now."

"Brock-"

"Heh, did he paint his nails black too?" Jacob scoffed, "That's kind of gay, man."

"If it's what he likes, let him be."

"Does he plan to be a drag queen for his career-"

"Cut it out, guys-"

"Though didn't he admit he was gay or trans at one point in middle school?" Craig asked, "You remember, Davie, don't you-"

"Okay, enough!" Hesh snapped, "That was a pretty shitty year for him, so just let him be."

* * *

The sounds of students chatting happily and noisily was blocked out by that loud, energetic guitars and drums in Logan's ears. His iPod was on shuffle, and for a short moment, he checked to see what song he was listening to. Though while distracted, he didn't notice that someone was looking over his shoulder. When he did notice the shadow, he almost jumped out of his skin. He turned around, seeing a female student, taller than him, and by the looks of it, older. He didn't even know her name, so he had no idea how to greet her. "Those are cool drawings," she commented, eying the journal.

Logan smiled a bit, "T-Thanks." _God, am I being awkward right now?_

"But a little word of advice," She sat next to him, gently taking the pencil out of his hand and flipping it over so the eraser would be touching the page, "Try not to shade in so much. It'll smear on the other pages and drawings." She erased some of the shadowed parts of Logan's art, and he just watched as she worked her magic. Though when she was finished, the skull he'd drawn looked surprisingly better than before. "Wow..." He smiled, "Thanks uh..."

"Becca," The girl said, grinning, "But people just call me, 'Beck'. You're David's brother, right? It's 'Logan'?"

"Uh, yeah..." Logan frowned a bit. To the entire school, he was known as 'suicidal-fag-who-nearly-committed-suicide-because-of-his-sexuality'. Almost _everyone_ knew about that incident after another student overheard his school counselor consider taking him to the ER while passing by the office. Since then, they never let him outlive it. Beck just rubbed his head, ruffling up his hair a bit, "Well, I just want to say things will get better, and I hope everything's treating you well."

"Oh. T-Thanks, Beck."

"I'll see you around. Tell your brother I said 'hi'!"

Beck skipped off in a different direction, and Logan felt warmth in his heart; The good kind of warmth; The feeling that lifted him up and feel for whatever reason, hopeful. Logan sighed cheerfully, hugging his journal to his chest. Though it was suddenly interrupted by another shadow, much taller than Beck, and a bit more "buff". Logan once again nearly jumped when he heard the deep voice speak to him, "You get 'er number, buddy?"

Logan looked up to see another older student, who had bullied him since the first day of his freshman year. He was a friend of his brother's though, so he tried to show a little respect. He was called Brock, and he was big pain in the ass. "W-What? No." Logan stammered.

"Aw, that's a shame," He teased, pinching Logan's cheek, "What'd she have to say to you then?"

"She... Just gave me advice on my drawings-"

"Oh, you draw?" In a swift move, Brock removed Logan's journal from his hands. "Hey, d-don't-! Give it back-!"

"Ha! Davie, you've got quite the artist here!" Logan ignored that comment and tried reaching out for his journal. But the only thing keeping him from getting it was his height and the bigger kid's hand on his face. He heard Hesh's voice, speaking in that serious tone, "Brock, cut the shit right now!"

"Oh come on, Davie, I'm just messing with him-"

The end of his sentence was shortly cut off by the sound of Logan's palm brushing across his face, making a small slapping sound as his hand came into contact. With Brock, stunned and slightly weakened, Logan jumped and grabbed his journal out of Brock's hands. Hesh paid no mind to his friend, and instead walked over to his brother. "Logan," He cupped Logan's face, making him look up, "Are you alright?"

Logan stayed silent for a moment, looking over at Brock, who just sneered at him before walking away. "Yeah... I'm fine..."

But really, Logan could once again feel that dreaded feeling build up in his stomach once more. First his dad will see him dressed like death, and now he may need to be facing the back hand of this big brute. _This month is just so peachy..._

* * *

 **Second chapter done! Man, I want to write more. Just maybe two more. I don't want to make this too long because when I make things too long, I don't know what to draft for the next chapter XP But yeah. Looks like Logan's in deep shite now. I'm so evil XD**


	3. Migraine

"Have things been getting better at school?" The therapist questioned.

Logan shook his head, "It's the same thing everyday. They shove me, call me names, it never stops."

Since his depression was revealed to his brother, father, and guardian, Logan's found himself in the seat of his therapist's office every Thursday, talking about his inner feelings, family, and other things on his mind. "Sorry to hear," His therapist straightened up in her chair and cleared her throat, "But your dad's coming home tomorrow so, that should be something to look forward to, right?"

Logan found himself silent, and he didn't answer. One year ago from today, he recalled himself being highly suicidal and depressed out of his mind. It felt as if the whole world around him just started falling apart. Then there was that long trip to the mental hospital, where he had to go through a long ass evaluation, which fortunately didn't get him admitted. He was talked out of taking his own life, yet it didn't exactly make his sadness go away. Remembering all of that made his heart sink into that same dark place. Things still weren't exactly getting better. He continued to be bullied, mostly because of his dress sense and wearing eyeliner. Not that he could blame them for his own negativity, after all it was his choice to wear eyeliner and black nail polish. His therapist sighed, ripping out a sheet of paper from her clipboard and handing it to Logan. "Same time next week, okay?" She said, "Maybe we can get your dad to come in here go over the few things happening."

Logan nodded, taking the paper handed to him before leaving the room. Monica was in the waiting room, looking up from her cooking magazine and indicating that they'd come to an end of session. Hesh was at the house, possibly doing whatever it is he does he's home alone. Monica and Logan left the small building, heading out to her car and not saying anything to each other. Even when they started their ride home, it was absolutely silent. Monica looked over at Logan, who had his head leaned against the window. She asked, "What did you guys talk about today?"

"Same thing..." Logan replied softly, almost inaudible.

Monica looked at Logan, sighing, "Have you told the teachers; other counselors about them?"

"They don't give a shit."

"Hey! Watch your mouth, Logan. And second... Have you ever thought about... Standing up for yourself?"

"Do you really think it's that easy?"

"No, but... Sometimes you can't have someone else solve your problems."

"Alright..." Logan only shrugged. Monica looked at Logan, shaking her head, "I'll stop talking then."

They didn't say anything to each other for the rest of the ride home.

* * *

Logan couldn't sleep. All he could do was stare straight up at the ceiling and listen to his iPod. He put on the "calmest" music he had on there in hopes that he'd settle down. He even took melatonin, not even counting how many pills he was taking. Not that he'd die from a handful, but there wasn't any doubt he'd feel and look like hell in the morning. After looking up at the ceiling long enough, he took off his headphones and sighed, laying an arm over his eyes. He couldn't get his mind off of the past. He thought of the suicide note he had written, and immediately crumpled up.

 _What if I carried out to kill myself? What if it actually worked? Maybe I wouldn't be in so much pain... Would anyone even care?_ Logan still felt like he was in a dark cloud, and he still felt the pain of being emotionally hurt. Finally, he got up, walking out his room and making his way toward Hesh's.

Fortunately, the light in his room was still on. Logan held his hand to knock on the door, but before he could do that, the door already opened. Logan froze, meeting his brother's weary, but surprised eyes, "L-Logan, hey."

"H-Hi..." Logan lowered his arm, "Whatcha doin?"

"Stretching my legs. I was just gonna go outside and stand on the deck for a while. Did you... Need something?"

"I just... I wanted to talk."

Hesh smiled and nodded. He's heard of this excuse many times before. By "Wanting to talk", it really defined to, "I can't sleep and I want to be with you for a while."

Silently, Hesh and Logan slipped out into the back, their gentle footsteps were heard along with the chirping of crickets. The two got a look at the city of Los Angeles from where they stood. It was an explosion of lights as well as the sky full of stars. It calmed Logan down, and he exhaled deeply.

"So what's up?" Hesh questioned.

"I just can't stop thinking," Logan shook his head, "About last year..."

Hesh frowned, and his baby brother continued, "I keep thinking about how _dead serious_ I was about ending right there... I don't know what made me, y'know, snap out of it and get help... But what if I _didn't_." Logan's voice began to break, "What if I just killed myself without thinking about everyone else? What would happen if I actually did it..." His words drifted off into a cry, and Hesh pulled him in, shushing him calmly while rubbing one hand on his back and the other in the blonde locks of hair.

"Logan," He whispered, "Remind how long ago that was?"

"One year..."

"And we're standing right in the present. It's all behind us, and all we think about is right now and the future. Okay?"

Logan snuggled in further into Hesh's chest, nodding. "Alright," The older sibling ruffled up his younger brother's hair. "What else is bothering you?"

"A lot of other stuff."

"I'm all ears."

From there, Logan shared everything he told his therapist, and Hesh kept his word and heard him out.

* * *

 ** _(Squeals)_ I just love making comforting fluff between those two! So damn adorable! **


	4. Teenagers

**I tried to put a lot of effort into this chapter. But it just turned out... Blergh :p**

* * *

Logan waited outside for his older brother to finish up his last class as the group of high schoolers began to drive away and enjoy their weekend. Along the way, he felt something being pinned to his backpack. He jumped for a second before reaching over his shoulders to see what as hanging there. He struggled.

Then finally, the "thing" pinned to Logan's back was ripped off before he had a chance to get it. Logan looked around for minute to see who gave him a helping hand, and he looked up to see Beck, holding a sheet of paper and reading what it had to say. "Uh, thanks," Logan said, and Beck looked at him, smiling and nodding.

"What... Does it say?"

Beck crumpled up the sheet, "I really don't think you'd like it that much."

"Oh..." _Should've known._

"So, what've got planned for the rest of the weekend?"

"Um... My dad's coming home tonight... I guess my brother and I will spend some time with him."

"Where's he been?"

"He was deployed. Y'know. To fight the war. He was somewhere in South America for a while."

"Your dad's a soldier? Dude, that's totally badass!"

Logan grinned, clearing his throat before asking, "Hey, uh, Beck?"

"What's up?"

"So... Everyone's been bullying me and shit, right?"

"Uh, yeah...? I mean, to my knowledge I guess it's still happening to you. Did something come up?"

"No, but- Why don't you pick on me? I mean- Not that I don't want to be picked on. But it's happened to me too much that I'm used to it."

Beck shook her head, "Logan. First of all, it's bullshit that you're being teased and attacked like that for a small reason. It's pretty much bullshit for everyone who's been down that path. Especially for you because believe it or not, there are actually several kids who are like you in this school, yet they don't get teased."

"Yeah well, I bet they weren't the ones who attempted suicide then."

"Oh, Logan..." She chuckled, "You're not the only one who tried to commit suicide. I've been there... And I don't want to go back."

Logan looked over at Beck, a little shocked, "W-Why?"

"I told a few friends I was a lesbian, and let's just say they were the wrong kind of friends to tell. Kids started calling me 'dyke' and other slangs that just drove me over the edge. Literally. I... Almost drove my car over a bridge at one point because it was just too much."

"Wow... Guess we're on the same page then. Though I really didn't have a plan of suicide..."

"But to be honest. I'm glad I didn't do it. I wouldn't have met other nicer people in this world, and also other girls with the same sexuality."

Logan grinned again, "My dad talked me out of it... Hesh too."

"You see? There're some pretty good people out there-" Beck was interrupted by a short 'Beep!' from one of the cars. "Oh, that's my mom," Beck ran off, "See ya, Logan!"

Logan waved, feeling that same, warmth in his heart. He smiled to himself, which soon turned into laughter. He knew he was blushing from happiness, something he hasn't felt in a long time. Though that moment of joy was ripped away when he felt his pocket vibrate. I reached in and pulled out his phone, surprised to see Elias was trying to get a hold of him. He felt every gut in his body drop. Logan inhaled, answering the call, "H-Hey, dad."

"Logan," He heard his dad chuckled a bit, "I'm surprised you picked up."

"Er... Yeah... Um, so what's up?"

"Well, that's what I cam to call you about since Hesh isn't picking up." Elias paused, sighing, "My flight's been delayed. There's apparently a big storm headed your way and won't blow over until morning."

"Oh..." Logan swallowed.

"Both you and your brother get home safe. I'll see you in the morning-"

"Dad." Logan's voice cracked, and he stayed silent. He bit down on his lip and closed his eyes.

"Logan? Are you there?"

"Y-Y-Yeah," Logan failed to hide the emotion in his voice, "It's just... I miss you... I missed you and... I'm _sorry_..."

Logan's eyes watered, and he began breathing deeply and silently to control how he felt as he heard his dad's voice. His hand shook, and Elias finally said, "I missed you too, Logan. Very much. I love you."

"B-Bye," Logan hung up and exhaled a shaky breath. He swallowed hard once more and blinked as another stream of tears poured from his eyes. He ran his hand over his eyes, knowing that he might be smearing some of the eyeliner. He breathed out again, which was shortly cut off by a deep voice. A rather intimidating one for that matter, "Walker!"

Logan swiveled around quickly, clutching his phone and being met with Brock. What made it worse was that the first thing he saw was the smudged make up and tears. "Heya, bud," Brock set his hand down on Logan's shoulder heavily, "What's the matter? You break up with your boyfriend or something?"

"N-No just... _Piss off_ ," Logan hissed, turning around to walk away, but Brock tightened his grip, "Excuse me? What'd ya say?"

"I'm not...! In the fucking mood to deal with what you have to say right now-"

"Oh, well guess what? You're just gonna need to wait a while and listen to me, you little shit," Brock continued, "You didn't forget about a couple days ago, right? You know, when you slapped me in front of all those kids outside."

"You wouldn't cut it out-"

"But you know I just playing with you, right Logan?"

"I don't care-"

"And let me tell you, Logan. Everyone's been talking about it, and I would've slugged you right after that if I could... But with Davie there, I couldn't. However..." Brock moved his hand to the collar of Logan's shirt, "You're big brother's not here to protect your ass this time, is he?"

"I've had enough, Brock- Let go!" Logan struggled, but it only seemed to amuse the older kid. Though the laughter was shortly cut off by a glob of spit flying from Logan's mouth, landing directly on Brock's eye. He let go, and Logan took the opportunity to run. Though he couldn't run for long, seeing that Brock sped up to him, immediately pinning him against the ground. Both landed against the cold grass, and Logan's vision faded out for a short moment as his head came in contact. He felt his hair being pulled up, Brock hissing, "You see? This is what happens when you try to fight someone stronger than you, bud-"

"Get off!" Logan growled and tried to spit again, but was completely cut off as he was flipped onto his back, Brock standing up. Logan tried crawling away, but didn't since there was really nowhere to crawl to. "What'ya gonna do now, Logan?" Brock taunted, "Huh? You gonna fight back? You gonna cry for help?"

Logan tried kicking at Brock, but missed, resulting in him getting kicked in the ribs. He gasped, almost curling up, but he earned another several strikes to the stomach. Logan coughed, clutching his rib area. "You want another, little shit?" Brock continued to taunt Logan, "I've got all day."

Logan coughed again, sitting up a bit, "F-Fuck you." A bad idea, seeing how he got kicked again, this time at his cheek bone. Logan was stunned for a moment, seeing stars for a split second. The next thing he knew, Brock's foot was planted against the side of his face. "I'm tougher than you, fag." Logan felt a tear slip from the corner of his eye, which Brock obviously saw, "Go ahead, Walker. Cry. It hurts, doesn't it? Well remember this next time when you-"

The rest of his words were cut off by him being pulled away from Logan, who painfully sat up only to see his brother, pinning Brock up against a tree. The look in Hesh's eyes was a look Logan never saw before. He was downright _pissed._ "Davie, I-"

"Touch my brother again and I won't hesitate to break your fucking arm," Hesh snarled. He threw Brock to the ground, who quickly got up and looked at Hesh. _Shit, he was serious._ "Fine, bro," Brock put his hands up defensively before brushing, himself off, walking away, "Fuck, man."

Hesh waited until he was far enough, before looking down at his baby brother. The look in his eyes softened, and he crouched down beside his brother, " _Shit,_ Logan... What happened? What'd he do to you?"

Logan coughed, "He..." More tears ran down his face, and he covered his eyes, not wanting Hesh to look at him.

"Logan, what? Did he hurt you?"

Logan only nodded.

"That fucking-"

"Hesh... Let's just go home... Dad won't be here until morning..."

Hesh was silent for a moment before sighing, "Alright... Hey," He took Logan's hand off of his face, forcing his baby brother to look at him, "It's okay. I'm not gonna let anyone do that to you again."

"But Brock's your friend..."

"Not anymore."

* * *

 **Thanks for being patient for this update. School's been really time consuming, but to add on I've also started a poll, which you can find on my profile. Be sure to vote there so I can see what you guys want me to write next! Goodnight folks!**


	5. Saviour

"Is Logan coming down?" Monica questioned, glancing out of the window as the heavy rain and wind raged outside.

"He fell asleep too early," Hesh answered, not looking up from his laptop.

"It's only seven."

"He didn't have a great day." He swallowed, knowing sooner or later Monica would see the bruise on Logan's face. Next thing she would do is overreact, and in all honesty wasn't a pretty thing to see. She'd eventually cool down, but her panicked state would last for years (Or it acted that way).

"Well can you at least get him to come down here? He spends way too much time "

"He probably might be _'completely'_ asleep-"

"I don't care. He can go back to bed soon."

"Alright, fine."

Hesh set his laptop off to the side and pushed himself off of Elias' arm chair. It had been moments ago that Monica came home, unaware of the bruises on Logan's body. She'd been apparently caught in traffic due to the heavy rainfall outside. A shallow river already appeared to be flooding down the streets. Hesh approached Logan's door, giving it a few taps with his fingers, "Logan?" When he tried twisting the door open, he was surprised to see that it was locked. Logan's never kept his door locked in all the years Hesh has lived with his brother. "L-Logan...!" He knocked again, using his knuckles this time, "Come on! Unlock the door!"

Hesh could hear footsteps from the other side, the door remained shut. "David... P-Please just leave me alone," Logan's muffled voice sounded cracked and weary.

"A-Are you okay?"

"I'm fine just... Go away..."

"Logan, o-open up right now! You're kind of freaking me out!"

"Hesh-"

"Now, Logan!" He stopped at the sudden raise of his voice, sighing, "L-Look, I know something's wrong. Maybe... I can help?"

After a few seconds or more, the door clicked, but only creaked open just a little bit. Hesh could only see half of his brother's face, who spoke in broken voice, "I'm fine... I just want to be alone right now."

"Logan," Hesh didn't miss a tear sliding from his baby brother's eye, "Why are you crying?"

"I'm just losing my shit right now and I can't fucking control it-"

At the opportunity, Hesh pushed open the door, switching on the light switch as he entered Logan's room and saw that his brother's face was absolutely drenched in his own tears. The sight made Hesh's heart sink. But he suddenly gasped when he saw blood on Logan's arm. There was just one horizontal cut, but it bled heavily. Logan broke down even more, literally shaking for being the mess that he was right now. "Holy shit..." Hesh grabbed his arm, taking a closer look at the cut. It wasn't just one. It was two bunched up together. They fortunately didn't look deep enough, but damn it was almost too hard for him to look at. His eyes gazed over to Logan's desk, where there laid a box cutter blade with the edges dripping with a line of blood. "C'mon," He dragged Logan out of the room and brought him into the bathroom, where he anxiously pulled out the first aid kit.

Hesh was trying to keep it together. He certainly didn't feel calm after seeing the blood. Then he ran a towel under the faucet of warm water, all while staying absolutely fucking silent. Logan had his other hand covered over his face, embarrassed and ashamed. "Hesh..." Logan gasped shortly after his older brother pressed the wet towel against the cuts. Hesh didn't respond, and Logan peeked through his fingers to see if he could get a view of his face. Then slowly, he took is own hand off of his face, blinking when he got a glimpse of the expression. "Are you... Upset at me...?" Logan managed to speak.

Hesh looked up, his expression softening up after more tears sprung from Logan's eyes. He inhaled. Then exhaled, digging through the first aid kit and pulling out a pair of gauge pads and pressing them up against the cuts. "Hesh," Logan's voice cracked again, "I-I... I'm sorry... You weren't supposed to see that-"

"Shh." Hesh hissed, clenching his teeth and sighing heavily before replacing the gauge pads with two new ones. He didn't say anything else. He just shook his head.

"I'm sorry-"

"Stop apologizing, Logan. God, I don't even know what to say right now." Hesh looked back at his brother, "You're staying with me tonight. I'm not letting you kill yourself-"

"Hesh...!" Logan sniffed, his voice wavering, "I... I wasn't going to kill myself-"

"Then what the hell were you just doing now?!" Hesh raised his voice, and Logan ducked his head, trying his absolute best not to be a complete sob fest. He failed, and Hesh realized he didn't exactly make the situation any better. He sighed heavily, trying to calm down. He removed the gauge pads, seeing that the cuts weren't bleeding as bad as before. His heartbeat simmered as he pulled out an antibiotic to rub on the shallow wounds on. Hesh could feel his own heartbeat in his head, and Logan's sobs settled down as well. "Are you gonna tell dad? Or Monica?" Logan asked.

Hesh wrapped a bandage on the cuts, straightening up soon after. He sighed again, "Logan, I... They're gonna find out at some point."

Logan closed his eyes, nodding.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you. I just... I just freaked out because I didn't think you'd actually do that to yourself."

"Oh..."

"Logan... I understand. This year was absolute shit. But... I know that you're stronger than this, and..." He rubbed the bandaged wound, "This is no way of... Making yourself feel better. I don't know what you want to hear right now but..." Hesh ducked his head, " _Don't hurt yourself_."

Logan swallowing back the next cry rising in his throat, and instead wrapped his arms around his brother, feeling all of a sudden very tired. But he actually did feel better after a good while of being an emotional mess. But that didn't mean it was over. Logan had some tears left over, and he cried into his brother's shoulder. Hesh held him tightly, "It's okay, Logan. I'm here."

"Do you still want me to spend the night with you?"

Hesh pulled in his brother even closer, "Yes..."

* * *

Logan felt heaviness in his head, and when he opened his eyes, he immediately wanted to shut them. He just felt so _tired_. He hugged the sheets even tighter. Logan opened his eyes again, this time keeping them open. This wasn't his bed. This wasn't his room either. He rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. The bed felt empty, and when Logan's eyes wandered, he slowly processed that this was his brother's room. _Oh right..._ He sat up, rubbing his eyes repeatedly until the weariness made its way out. Hesh wasn't in the room, and when he looked at the clock on the end table, he saw that it was nearly 11:00.

Logan swung his legs over the bed, setting his feet down on the carpet as he stretched his limbs out. "Damn..." His eyes became sensitive to the light shining through the curtains. He had considered going back to bed (In his own room this time). But as he got up, he heard voices coming from outside. Logan was wide awake now, and he walked over to the window and brushed open the curtain slightly. The first thing he saw that made his insides freeze up was Elias' pick up truck in the driveway. Then running out to greet the returning soldier was Hesh. Logan swallowed, a knot beginning to twist in his stomach. Then he let out a heavy sigh. He didn't care if he looked like the living dead. He didn't care about the bruise on his face or the bandage on his arm. He walked out of the bedroom, stopping by his room to step into a pair of slippers and taking in a another breath, prepared for anything his father had to say to him.

He walked down the stairs and towards the front door. He closed his eyes, twisting and opening the door and stepping outside as he heard Monica say aloud, "Logan's been sleeping in all morning..." And what not.

Logan wanted to turn back and hide, but he's already hidden long enough. He walked down the path to the driveway, and as he turned the corner, he found himself looking into the eyes of his father. Logan swore he could feel his gut turn into a full circle as he saw surprise written in the old man's eyes. "Logan," Was all he could say.

"Hey dad..." Logan wrapped his arms around Elias, who did the same but held tighter. Logan buried his head into his shoulder all while his racing thoughts filled the emptiness in his head. _Is he mad? Does he even want to see me?_ Elias pulled away to look at the kind of teen Logan's been growing into. What he wasn't expecting was to see a bruise under his son's eye. "Woah, what happened there?" He brushed his thumb gently over the bruise, "Are you okay?"

Logan hesitated, but sighed, "I... Got jumped by another jackass at school."

"You're serious-"

"But dad. I-It's okay. Really. Hesh sure as hell's gonna make sure it won't happen again. But... I was sort of asking for it in someway." He chuckled and gave the old man a reassuring smile.

Elias moved his hand up to rub Logan's long and messy hair, smiling slightly, "I'm just glad you're alright. It's been quite the crazy month, and... All I wanted was to come home and see you both. I think it'll be a very long while until a return to back to the base."

"I missed you, dad," Logan couldn't help but hug Elias again, looking at his brother while doing so, who gave him a nod and a smile.

* * *

When Elias finished unpacking, Monica had began pack up her things as well. Logan had gotten dressed into his clothes, excluding any long sleeved shirts. He stopped as he passed by the guest bedroom, where Monica had zipped up her suitcase, ready for her return home after what felt like forever of being stuck at this house. He gave the door a few taps before entering the room. "Hey," he greeted.

"Hey," She replied, "You gonna spend time with your dad?"

"Soon, but... I just came here to say thanks."

Monica raised an eyebrow, "Thanks?"

"You know, for giving a shit about me."

She looked at him before chuckling, "You're welcome, I guess." She shrugged the strap of her purse around her shoulders, "I hope things get better for you. I really do."

Logan stood for a moment, smiling and nodding before moving out of the way to allow Monica to pass through. "Oh, come on," She smiled again, "I think we've known each other long enough." Then she spread her arms out.

"Oh! Uh, okay," Logan made the hug short, not wanting to be awkward or anything like that. Monica broke away, "Well, guess this is goodbye."

"Yeah, see ya', I guess."

Monica slid by, walking out the door. Logan looked out the window as she drove away. Until she was out of his view, Logan walked back upstairs and over to Elias' room, where he'd finished up unpacking as Hesh stared down at a damaged and dusty helmet his father brought back from the firefight he was in. "Sounds like it was rough," Hesh rotated the helmet

"That's war for you," Elias turned his attention over to Logan, who rubbed his arm with the bandage covering one part of it.

"Hey dad?" Logan suddenly looked at Hesh, "Er, can I have a minute with him?"

"Yeah, sure," Hesh laid the helmet off to side, leaving and closing the door behind him.

"You alright, kiddo?" Elias questioned walking over to his youngest son.

"Yeah- Well no, I mean... I don't know..."

"Talk to me then."

Logan glanced up at his father, then back down at his own feet. "Are you... Mad at me?"

"Mad?"

"For not talking to you... Since Hesh told me, I felt like a complete douche for the past few days. I sure wasn't mad at you but..."

"Logan..." Elias placed his hand on Logan's shoulder, "Does it have to do with the kids at school?"

Logan shrugged, "A little. They've been driving me over the edge... A little..."

"Hm..."

"But then... Well I just started listening to a lot of songs I could relate to. They made me feel a little better and... Well I started dressing like this..." Logan gestured his hands over the black clothes he was dressed in, "And, I guess I was just scared about how you'd react. I mean you've seen those kids before and-"

"Logan..." Logan noticed how Elias' lips formed into a small smile, then he let out a soft chuckle, "You really do remind me of your mother."

Logan blinked. _What...?_

"She really was like you when she was your age. She dressed like that, listened to those kind of emotional tracks."

 _What?!_

"She knew what it was like to be different, Logan," He frowned a bit, looking at the small bandage on his son's arm, "I think she even had those kind of tendencies."

"Er... Yeah..."

"We'll save that discussion for another time, but I guess the point I'm trying to make here is that you're my son. And I'll still love you know matter what."

"Really...?"

" _No matter what_."

* * *

 **Aaannnddd I'm ending it there. I know I probably could've done better, but I just wanted to finish a story at some point. I hoped you liked it anyway, and if you didn't... Then at least thanks for reading, and Happy Halloween :33**


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